August 2026

All months

• Saturday, August 1, 2026 Good Morning!!! Are you dead yet?
• Sunday, August 2, 2026 The real terrorism is bad vibes. Declare war on them!!!
• Monday, August 3, 2026 If the shareholders cared who you were, they would appreciate all you’re doing for them!!! Happy Monday!!!
• Tuesday, August 4, 2026 I’ve got pictures to prove it! Good Morning!!!
• Wednesday, August 5, 2026 Love will leave a blood soaked trail of revenge!!! Good Morning!!!
• Thursday, August 6, 2026 The Morning that can be mourned is not The Entire Morning!!!
• Friday, August 7, 2026 Anything goes on Friday. Does that sound crazy? Well, I’ve got some advice for you - Don’t Be A Cop! Happy Friday!!!
• Saturday, August 8, 2026 It’d be smart to do that.
• Sunday, August 9, 2026 Good Morning!!! For too long, we have been victimized by the War on Sunday. It’s time to pick on every service worker you interact with to force them to say “Happy Sunday!”
• Monday, August 10, 2026 Happy Monday!!! Here comes another long week!!!
• Tuesday, August 11, 2026 Good Morning!!! Embrace impermanence!!!
• Wednesday, August 12, 2026 ♫♪Take my words that I’ll never regret, WOAH-OH smoke cigarettes!!!♫♪ - Jon BJ
• Thursday, August 13, 2026 Back in my day, the sun had spikes so long and sharp, you could poke your capri sun open on ‘em.
• Friday, August 14, 2026 There’s nothing in the rulebook that says you can’t just mellow out on Friday!!!
• Saturday, August 15, 2026 Having a tough time? Why did you decide to do that? Well, it’s not too late. Decide a smile on your face!!!
• Sunday, August 16, 2026 A Good Morning is always a pleasant surprise!!! Every Day!!!
• Monday, August 17, 2026 No no no, not that kind of slavery. Wage slavery. It’s much cooler and more normal. Happy Monday!!!
• Tuesday, August 18, 2026 From my hand computer to yours, with love!!!
• Wednesday, August 19, 2026 The other 10%? It’s a mix of Golden Rays of Happiness and rum. Good Morning!!!
• Thursday, August 20, 2026 I know what that’s like, kid. Good Morning!!!
• Friday, August 21, 2026 The Weekend is so much fun and it’s here now!!! It doesn’t matter how many pills you take at work today or what kind!!! Anything Goes!!!
• Saturday, August 22, 2026 It’s just not right to be unimpressed by a bird.
• Sunday, August 23, 2026 A Good Morning is Supernatural!!!
• Monday, August 24, 2026 As is the first law of our prophet Garfield, “I hate Mondays.” But so as he taketh, does he give unto us his second law, “Lasagna”.
• Tuesday, August 25, 2026 Good Meowning!!!
• Wednesday, August 26, 2026 My child gets a free book monthly thanks to Dolly. Reading changed Dolly’s life and she blessed so many kids with that gift. Every month we thank her for the book and talk about why we’re grateful. We talk about how she could have been a billionaire but her whole life was spent choosing helping over hoarding. We were so lucky to have her. RIP Please consider a donation to her imagination library in her memory. Dolly Parton’s Imagination Library | USA, UK, IE, CA, AU
• Thursday, August 27, 2026 It’s a total horrorshow, I know. Doesn’t bother me though ‘cause I’m having a Good Morning every day no matter what.
• Friday, August 28, 2026 It’s FRIDAY, don’t THINK, just DO. Let Rationality clock out and Action clock in. FRANKLY, it’s Time to GO PSYCHO!!!
• Saturday, August 29, 2026 They won’t let you print anything on a beautiful North American landscape that isn’t real wisdom so you can trust this one. Good Morning!!!
• Saturday, August 29, 2026 It’s summertime, baby!!!
• Sunday, August 30, 2026 You probably want to be having a Good Morning. Think about it.
• Monday, August 31, 2026 This is what my inbox looks like right now. Good Morning!!!