capitalism 25 mornings

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• Monday, September 28, 2026 Your job doesn’t define you! The exhaustion your job causes defines you. Good Morning!!!
• Thursday, August 13, 2026 Back in my day, the sun had spikes so long and sharp, you could poke your capri sun open on ‘em.
• Monday, July 13, 2026 C'mon, babe, don’t be fearing the reaper.
• Monday, July 6, 2026 Good Morning!!! Abolish work!!!
• Monday, June 22, 2026 Good Morning and Get Moving!!!
• Monday, June 15, 2026 Good Morning. Glad to see you’re smiling. Can you have that on my desk by noon?
• Thursday, May 14, 2026 Your smile is a valuable commodity!!!
• Friday, May 1, 2026 Happy May Day, workers!!!
• Monday, February 23, 2026 Good Morning, human capital stock!!!
• Monday, December 8, 2025 “Actually, I consider myself a sovereign employee of MegaCorp and I do not recognize your authority to fire me. You didn’t see the paper I taped on the back of my chair?”
• Monday, November 17, 2025 It’s like Marx said, “While money can’t buy happiness, it certainly lets you choose your own form of misery.” Good Morning!!!
• Monday, August 4, 2025 “Oh cool. Thanks for putting in the extra effort. I’ll remember this when the inevitable layoffs kick in and if they pick you, I’ll feel extra bad. Happy Monday!!!”
• Saturday, July 26, 2025 Maybe you should just quit? Ever think about that? You could just walk out if you wanted. Interesting Idea. Good Morning!!!
• Monday, July 14, 2025 Oh and by the way, nice healthcare you’ve got there. It’d be a real shame if something were to happen to it, wouldn’t it? Maybe if *I* was worried about that, *I’d* get back to work immediately. Good Morning!!!
• Monday, December 9, 2024 Good Morning!!! You better hope your manager doesn’t see you right now.
• Monday, August 12, 2024 Good Morning!!! Have a Happy Day!!! Don’t think about what your time is really worth!!!
• Monday, June 24, 2024 Good Morning. Please think of the bosses!!!
• Monday, June 3, 2024 Let’s keep those gears oiled, workers!!! Good Morning!!!
• Monday, May 13, 2024 Every time I eat a burger, I wonder if that cow had a nice 401k. Happy Monday.
• Thursday, April 25, 2024 “Okay, this is basically my dream job! How’s the healthcare?” “Depends on how much of a capitalist hellscape your home country is.”
• Wednesday, January 10, 2024 The *real* emergency is profitability! Good Morning!!!
• Monday, November 27, 2023 Nothing worse than the guilt of having to take care of your family in an emergency. Good Morning!
• Monday, June 26, 2023 Some people feel like they have no purpose but maybe your purpose is to have your labor exploited!!! Good Morning!!!
• Monday, June 12, 2023 Those shareholders aren’t going to receive maximum return on investment without you!!!
• Tuesday, July 26, 2022 Rise and Grind, Capitalists